Author:
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
the_deep_magic Pairing: Pinto
Word Count: 5,390
Rating: NC-17
Warning: a bit o’ crack
Summary: for this prompt at the kink meme – Chris has written a bucket list of things he wants to do before he dies. Having sex with a man is one of them. Zach finds said list and decides to offer his services.
A/N: To quote Ron Burgundy: “That escalated quickly. I mean, that really got out of hand fast.” Um, merry Christmas?
( When he looks up, Zach is grinning like the cat that not only ate the canary, but also discovered a back way into a pet shop called The Slow, Overweight Canary Emporium. )
- Mood:
sleepy
Author:
the_deep_magic Pairing: Pinto
Rating: PG-13 for language
Word Count: 2,225
Warnings: kid fic, a heaping helping of fluff
Disclaimer: This probably didn’t/won’t happen.
Summary: A future in which Zach and Chris are the loving parents of a distressed – no, really, HEARTBROKEN – teenager
A/N: I wrote kid!fic. Um, don’t shoot me? I’m filling my own prompt from the kink meme, but I lost the link. If anyone knows where it is, let me know!
( The slammed door startled Chris so much that his pencil tore a hole in the thin newsprint of the crossword puzzle. )
- Mood:
bouncy
I am being punished for that thought.
Finally met with my advisor yesterday -- only a week late -- and I am going to have to push my defense date back into the summer. It's no one's fault but my own, but I'm still a little steamed. I really want to be done with this.
However, the good news is that I will hopefully be posting a whole bunch of stuff over the coming few weeks. I have a ton of half- and almost-finished fics languishing on my hard drive and some spare time to work on them. So, y'know, good times.
- Mood:
cranky - Music:Golden Girls theme song (oy vey)
Fulfilling a Fantasy (NC-17, complete) WARNING: this is a rape roleplay fic (both partners are consenting, but it doesn't read that way at first). I knew that going in, which is the only reason I read it. I love the contrast between the just-this-side-of-squicky hotness of the sex and the complete tenderness of the aftercare.
I Will Possess Your Heart (R-ish, up to 8/9) Stalker!fic. The OMC is creepy as hell, but you get to see Pinto through his eyes, and it's oddly sweet.
You Can See My Heart Beating (PG-13ish, up to 3.5/?) A slow-building h/c in which Chris has been abused and is in denial.
In other news, I feel like writing some Kirk/Spock/Uhura, but I find myself lacking inspiration in that pairing. (Is it a pairing if it's more than two people? A triad? A gaggle? A clump?) So if you have any plotbunnies, please share. I won't make any promises, but I'd love to hear some ideas!
- Mood:
nerdy - Music:Theme from "Alfred Hitchcock Presents" -- just... don't ask
Haven't bought my plane ticket to New Zealand yet -- in all honesty, that's actually Plan E, somewhere behind writing trashy romance novels and joining the circus. Do people still run away and join the circus? Most seem to be composed of European families that have passed down the noble skill of chainsaw juggling for generations upon generations. I can peel a banana with my toes, though. Can shuck corn, too. I have monkey feet.
Am I the only one to see the Avatar preview and think "meh"? It looks like the world's longest and most expensive ad campaign for a video game. Speaking of...
( Mild spoilers for that Bones episode -- you know which one I'm talking about )
Also, is it just me, or do the recent episodes seem to forget about the A plot until the last 10 minutes? It goes like this: murder, Booth and Brennan bicker, Cam rolls her eyes, pointless interrogation scene for the Sweets fangirls, Hodgins and Intern-of-the-Week bicker, Cam rolls her eyes, Angela and Hodgins exchange Meaningful Looks, Cam rolls her eyes, Booth and Brennan have a Difference of Opinion, Angela talks some sassy sense into Brennan and calls her "Sweetie," OH SHIT WE FORGOT ABOUT THE MURDER, HERE THIS GUY DID IT, Booth and Brennan have SEXUAL TENSION OMG GUYS SO UNRESOLVED MAYBE THEY WILL DO IT NEXT WEEK SO KEEP WATCHING.
Is TV getting worse, or am I just now developing standards?
Y'know what part of fandom I just can't get into? Fanvids. Some of the funny ones, okay, but I just can't take most of them seriously. This might have to do with a particularly traumatic experiences in my younger years, in which no one mentioned the fact that the X Files fanvid I was watching was spliced with porno footage. "Awww, look, Mulder is comforting Scully and-- UNEXPECTED DICK!" So maybe it's that, no matter how artfully your fanvid is made, some small, cringing part of me is just waiting for the dick.
Yeah, I said that. I'd say it again, too.
*Dear Thailand: I'm sorry. That was uncalled for.
- Mood:
loopy - Music:"A Cautionary Tale" ~The Decemberists
If I may quote Jim Halpert: Lord, beer me strength.
- Mood:
melodramatic anguish
Okay, it's not THAT bad -- I just chose the wrong school and since I've finished classes and the comp exam, my brain has already checked out. But if I don't get my ass into gear soon, my thesis is going to consist of 80-100 pages of dirty limericks in 72-pt font, and while that would be amusing in a certain state of intoxication, I think my committee might notice that something's up. Or maybe I should just print out all the fanfic I've written over the past semester and hand that in. I'm sure that would go over well.
My point: if I don't reply to something immediately, it's because I am neck-deep in rhetorical theory. Please send motivating thoughts and good juju my way.
- Mood: unproductive
· When shopping for produce to freeze with liquid nitrogen and drop off a four-story parking structure, tomatoes and kiwis are your best bet. Watermelons sound like a good idea, but they take a huge amount of time to prep and the results are not appreciably different from a room-temperature melon.
· No matter how much you want that burrito, it is not worth driving through hurricane-force winds and rain to get. You’re not impressing anyone.
· DO NOT share living space with extended family members unless it is an absolute financial necessity (as in it’s that or a cardboard box under a highway overpass). People tried to warn me when I moved in with my cousin, but I thought “eh, how bad can it be?” Worst year of my life. She still shoots me the skunk eye at family gatherings.
· When transporting large amounts of dry ice in your car, make sure to roll the windows down or you will smother.
· Anyone who routinely starts sentences with “I’m not a racist, but…” is a racist.
· I’m sorry to have to tell you this, but no one gives a shit about your awesome new phone except you. It’s okay – just take a few deep breaths and accept it.
· If you’re ever in Japan, DO eat okonomiyaki, sushi (duh), donburi, those pork bun thingies whose name I always forget, gyoza, takoyaki, all the candy you can find, and (if you just really need something familiar) Mos Burger. DO NOT eat natto. You shouldn’t have any trouble recognizing it – if someone offers you a bowl of snot that smells like rotting garbage, politely decline.
· While I’m on the subject of Japan, if you ever go to the neighborhood sento (public bath), take at least one native Japanese speaker with you. Otherwise your life will quickly turn into a particularly wacky episode of I Love Lucy, only with 100% more nudity.
· Shower off immediately after Jello wrestling, especially if the Jello is red. That shit stains like you wouldn’t believe.
No, there's no need to thank me. Just keep rockin' the Casbah.
- Mood:
cheerful
Let us all learn what we can from these abhorrent examples. Words You Should NEVER Use While Writing Porn: irradiated, fish-slime, reeking, anchorage, squirrel, blubber, fragrant, oysterish, anticlockwise, and last -- but definitely not least -- Vaginaland.
Has anybody read any of these books? Is there any sort of context that would make a phrase like "the gravid tremulousness of her breasts" less than hilarious?
- Mood:
contemplative - Music:"Feng Shui" ~Gnarls Barkley
"Seventy-three percent of the words in Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address -- possibly the most famous speech in American history -- are one syllable or less."
Or less. Let that one simmer for a while.
My birthday's on Saturday, and I'm now officially at the point where birthdays stop being so exciting in and of themselves. I mean, I still want the presents and the attention and the cookie cake (GOD how I want the cookie cake), but I don't want to be another year older. Will everyone start bitch-slapping me if I whine that I'm TOO YOUNG to be 26? Most of the time, I pretty much feel like an 8-year-old who somehow got her hands on a driver's license and an (admittedly modest) checking account.
Grrrr, I have GOT to get going on my Trek RPF Exchange fic! Inspiration is a funny thing -- last time, I had the thing pretty much written in my head within two days. Now all I seem to be able to write is completely unrelated crack, which is fun, but does not work at all for the prompt.
- Mood: blah
- Music:rain
Author:
the_deep_magic Pairing: Pinto
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 2,428
Warnings: piercings, D/s, rimming
Disclaimer: All made up.
Summary: Zach gets corset piercings – prompted here at the kink meme
A/N: For those of you who like visual aids or need some convincing, please to imagine this (photo on the left) plus this. Pics are worksafe, but you might want to sit down first. For realsies.
A/N II: I realize it’s pretty similar in set-up to my other piercing fic, but this is how the muse handed it to me and I couldn’t be arsed to rewrite it. At least I’m only plagiarizing myself.
( “You actually did it,” Chris whispered, drawing his fingers down Zach’s spine reverently. “It’s beautiful.” )
- Mood:
horny
Author:
the_deep_magic Pairing: Pinto
Rating: PG
Word Count: 706
Disclaimer: All made up.
Summary: for this prompt at the kink meme – Saw a tweet and Tyler's having Thanksgiving with Zachary and 'friends'. Chris is jealous.
A/N: Just felt like writing some fluffy Post-Thanksgiving fluff. Did I mention the fluff?
( “You really are just an overgrown puppy.” )
- Mood: content
- Music:"Passenger Seat" ~Death Cab for Cutie
Leave a comment saying "resistance is futile."
1. I'll comment back with five questions.
2. Update your journal with the answers
3. Post these rules (or some variation)
**If you want to ask me more questions, feel free to do so in the comments
Questions given to me by
andieshep( Behold my interestingness! )
In only somewhat-related news, I once saw a bumper sticker that said "I am Dyslexic of Borg. Futile is resistance. Prepare to have your ass laminated." Shoulda bought it.
Also, if you did not participate in my DVD commentary meme but would like to, please do! I love to talk about my writing! So much that it borders on pathology!
- Mood:
blank - Music:"I'm Your Villain" ~Franz Ferdinand
ewinfic did this a couple of weeks ago and it sounded like fun, so...Pick a paragraph (or any passage less than 500 words) from any fanfic I've written, and comment to this post with that selection. I will then give you a DVD commentary on that snippet: what I was thinking when I wrote it, why I wrote it in the first place, what's going on in the character's heads, why I chose certain words, what this moment means in the context of the rest of the fic, lots of awful puns, and anything else that you'd expect to find on a DVD commentary track.
Can you tell I'm trying to avoid doing real work?
- Mood: hungry
I think I need to get the shouting out of the way first: DAMMIT I DID NOT KNOW THEY WERE HAVING THE STAR TREK DVD PARTY AT THE GRIFFITH OBSERVATORY BUT I WAS TOTALLY THERE ON SATURDAY AND I COULD HAVE, LIKE, HID OUT IN THE BATHROOM FOR TWO DAYS AND I WOULD'VE MISSED MY FLIGHT AND IT WOULD'VE BEEN TOTALLY WORTH IT.
Okay, all better. Well, kinda. So, yeah, LA was fun. I was visiting one of my oldest and best friends who recently graduated law school, and the trip was entirely too short. But both of us had to get back to work so we can afford our opulent lifestyles full of basic cable and brand-name grape juice. Highlights:
( Cut for length & ramblitude )
Okay, so I think I've rambled on long enough. I'm trying to get back in a writing frame of mind -- it's going well. I'm writing something so hot that I have to keep taking breaks so I don't get the vapors. ;o) It might just be a me thing, but I like it.
- Mood: enthralled
- Music:"Cherry Lips" ~Garbage (thank you, kink meme)
Title: Reverse the Polarities
Author: the_deep_magic
Pairing: Kirk/girl!Spock
Word Count: 2,344
Rating: NC-17
Warning: het (ish)
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters and I'm not making any money.
Summary: “Captain, I believe our current circumstances warrant some… scientific exploration.”
A/N: Obligatory genderswap porn. No plot whatsoever.
( Does it really matter how it happened? )
- Mood: geeky
- Music:"Seeing Other People" ~Belle & Sebastian
Title: Two Figures by a Fountain
Author: the_deep_magic
Pairing: Pinto
Rating: hard R
Word Count: 2,120
Warning: I don’t even know – literary homage porn? There’s some angst in there, too.
Disclaimer: I do not know these people, this never happened, and I did not write the book. My sincerest apologies to Ian McEwan.
Summary: Atonement AU prompted at the Sinfest v. 5. Zach is the son of a maid for the Pine family in 1935 England. He and Chris grew up together, and have recently reunited at the family estate over the summer holidays. Hopefully this will make sense even if you’re not familiar with the original.
A/N: Many thanks to ewinfic and forbiddenromancfor the feedback/enabling.
A/N II: Not to be bitchy, but there will be no sequel to this. It was either end it here or write a novel, and the novel’s already been written. So, um, read that. It’s good.
( Zach laid in the bath until the water turned cold, staring up at the cracked beams of the ceiling. )
- Mood:
hopeful
I am so fucked, you guys. Some brilliant anonymouse keeps posting these hilarious AU snippets on the kink meme in which Chris has a 10-year-old kid and Zach is the live-in nanny. I usually avoid kid!fic at all costs, but these are not sappy or cutesy in the least. Well, maybe a little cute, but in a sassy-bitch sort of a way.
Anyway, the problem: I love it so much I sat down last night and wrote roughly 3,000 words of two potential kid!fics. Okay, about two-thirds of it is just Zach/Chris dialogue, but seriously. Then it was 3:30 in the morning and I was all "Shit, forgot to sleep." So I'm a little loopy now, but yeah. I might be writing Big Gay Kid!fic and I don't know how I should feel about that.
So obviously the last fic I posted was not the Halloween-ish crack that I promised, but I am still working on that. It keeps taking strange turns on me. Sadly, I won't have much time to write coming up -- I'm going out of town for the next two weekends, first to New York and then (hopefully) to LA. Let's all pretend that I'm really that cosmopolitan and this isn't a big deal at all and I'm going to do something glamorous instead of mostly hanging out in my sister's dorm room and my friend's apartment, respectively.
Also, as you may have noticed, I have discovered glitter text. This can only lead to bad things.
Dammit you guys, there are sparkly dicks behind me, aren't there?
- Mood: dorky
- Music:"Float On" ~Modest Mouse
Author:
the_deep_magicPairing: Pinto
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 5,544
Warnings: offstage violence, angst, schmoop
Disclaimer: Not mine; didn't happen.
Summary: “Disturbance on the Heroes set… shots fired… tall, dark-haired man seen being loaded on to an ambulance. Shit, you don’t think that could be—”
A/N: Holy cow, a fic not prompted by the kink meme! Crazy times.
( It wasn’t even Chris’ usual coffee place, and the service was terrible. )
- Mood: calm
- Music:"Modern Romance" ~The Yeah Yeah Yeahs
